So you are here with a pain in your heart and looking for a way to work trough the pain. Some breakups are so bad that they can even make you hate the sunshine, friends and family. This is because you feel like nobody understands you. I can understand, some of you don't want to hear them cuz no one has the right to judge you or qualify your relationship.
Now it’s hard to imagine that you’ll ever feel better. So, what do you do want to do? You can hate it if you want or wish it wasn’t happened. The fact is that it’s happened and you can do nothing to the past.
I do know that we don't have a power of button or restart chance in a day but you can make it easier for you. Here are some advices from many girls around the world who work trough their pain.
They felt the way you do right now..
Allow yourself time to heal.
Get rest and feed yourself well, even if you don't feel much like eating. Food is important for your body, and this is a time that your body needs to repair itself. When you are physically injured, you are better stay off of the injured part of your body for a period of time. Remind yourself and maybe gently remind your well-intentioned family or friends that, like physical injuries, emotional injuries need time.
Give yourself permission to cry.
Yeah! I'm talking about one of those scream style, body convulsing ugly cries. If you haven’t given yourself a moment to process the breakup with a good cry, it might be time make it. It feels like you have so much to talk and wish from inside undo, this way will make your world bright again.
Make a clean break.
This is really important! In order to move on, you’re going to have the “no contact” rule. “But Im not ready-“ Stop right there and delete his or her number from your phone. Keeping in touch will only prolong your pain. Cut off all contact, and don’t convince yourself that you can make it work again.
Keep a full-time social schedule.
I know you like, want and can't stop to stalk your ex and self-pity is strong right after a split. But keep busy and you’ll be well on your way to post-split happiness. Take up a hobby or, if you already have one, throw yourself into it. Go out with your friends. Hit the gym. Put in extra hours at work. Start a new book/TV series/video game. Do That Thing whatever works for you.
Take stock of your ex’s worst qualities.
Make a list of everything you found worst parts of your ex. Then, whenever you get to missing Him/Her, think of the list or read it aloud to yourself .
If you lived together, makeover some changes in your space.
Move the furniture around in your apartment. Throw some of them if you have to. Get a few new pictures on the walls. Deep clean your apartment. Treat yourself to something new in your life, It’s a new chapter of your life so prepare yourself and your home base for it.
Time To Move On.
So you’re working through your emotions and taking some time for yourself and you’ve picked up a hobby to take your mind off things and help you meet new people. Great! You’re doing a great job moving past your relationship.
And if all else fails, give it time.
Don’t beat yourself up if none of the steps above are working for you. There really is no timetable for moving on and sometimes you just have to wait it out. All you need is a little time and a new perspective. Know that the pain you are feeling is normal. You might be worried that you will end up alone or that you won’t be happy again. Just remind yourself that it is normal to feel this way after a breakup and that you need to feel these emotions in order to move on.
I hope any of these will work for you and know that even if we don't know eachother I'm here to support you.
Vanessa Nasraoglu Ertürk